my take on it

So I'm back in Torrance. I've been here for nearly a week and nothing has happened. I've been sick, so I can't even go out. Plus, I have no means of transportation as my car is sitting in Berkeley. So I've just been sitting at home, playing with my laptop, and sleeping. Sounds great, huh? Eh. I suppose it's better than stressing myself out in Berkeley.
The point of coming back to Torrance was to get away from Berkeley and certain problems. I was supposed to be able to think clearly with a good distance between me and Berkeley. Unfortunately for me, this cold has not seemed to go away and my mind seems just as clouded. I've been thinking a lot about everything. I looked over a lot of my past diary entries, both online and in my old diary, and it's strange. I mean, I can still remember the events quite clearly, but I can't seem to follow my own train of thoughts. I've grown a lot since then and I think I would've acted much differently knowing what I do now. At the same time, I know that a couple of years from now, I'll look onto the events of today and wonder, "What the HELL was I thinking?!"
I found, however, that my ideals and visions of love have remained the same throughout the years. And now.. here I am. I gave up those very same principles to be with someone that I think may be The One. So then I begin to wonder if I'm sacrificing too much. Would The One really ask me to give that all up? Without those ideals, am I even the same person? I wonder...
I've also been doing a lot of thinking about soul mates. I was watching Sex and The City and there's this episode where Carrie and her crew decide to be each others' soul mates and to see dating as "great, nice guys to have fun with." I think that sort of makes sense. I used to think that your soul mate is the one person you're supposed to be with. In that sense, The One and soul mate was synonymous. But now I begin to think otherwise. I mean, I see it as your soul mate is supposed to be the one person who completely understands you. Not necessarily does this mean that this person is The One. Now I think that The One is just a feeling that you get. Yes, there are some requirements. For example, I may not think that my One completely gets everything I do/think/say, but he must be able to accept me for everything that I am and everything that I am not. In saying all this, I mean to say that it is quite likely that someone you are not romantically involved with just might be your soul mate. And it also may be true that your One may not necessarily be your soul mate. I just kind of like that idea because then I know that although I may never find The One, I'll always have my soul mate to fall back on. And I DO believe that I've found my soul mate.