my take on it

It's been quite a long time. I was watching some anime series and I suddenly had the urge to post.
First off, I've been watching a series called Lovely Complex. This series is about a couple of teenagers in high school. The heroine (Koizumi Risa) is unusually tall while the hero (Otani Atsushi) is unusually short. After a series of events where the two find themselves to have a lot in common, Koizumi falls head over heels for Otani. Otani does not feel the same way about Koizumi (or maybe he's just confused) because he has only ever seen her as a friend. The episodes continue with comedic, laugh-out-loud scenes, but in the end, gives a the viewer a heart-wrenching look into a lovesick school girl that cannot reach the object of her desires. The teenage heartache and angst is superbly written and portrayed; I find myself sympathetic and often in tears. Mind you, I am quite easily driven to tears.
Secondly, I've also been watching another series entitled Bokura ga Ita (We Were There). It's another high school series about teenagers making their way through life, romance, and self-evaluation. Again, this centers around a relationship between the two main characters. What intrigues me about this series is the progression of the relationship. It starts off as a one-sided interest and slowly builds the relationship from there. I haven't gone far into the series yet (into about episode 5) so the couple are still in the beginnings of their relationship. I have found this to be sweetly innocent and a beautiful understanding of what it is like to be in those first days of teenage love. From what I understand, the series will continue to chronicle the relationship, fights, drama, and all. I have high hopes that it will continue on a realistic depiction of "first love;" I do feel, though, that if it does continue this way, that I will need to steel myself to a "not so happy ending" for the couple. As much as I am a hopeless romantic and would like to see them have their happily ever after, I do not believe that it will fit in with the message of the show.
I find myself drawn to these shows. I feel myself wanting to experience it all again: the innocence of first love, of feeling your heart skip a beat, and all those silly antics of gaining the attention and affection of the one you're pining for.
There is this scene in Bokura ga Ita where the couple go on their first date to the movies. The boy asks the girl if he can rest his arm on the armrest separating the two. She agrees. Then he tells her that she can also rest her arm if she likes. She seems confused and agrees, although in her mind, she's thinking, "Where would I do that?" Partially through the movie, the boy starts to flex his fingers on the armrest. She notices and he replies, "Oh.. just some finger exercises." She then notices that he has left half the armrest for her to put her arm down. She does and they hold hands for the rest of the movie. It's all just so innocently sweet that I can't help but to smile.
There is another scene in Lovely Complex where the girl visits the boy at his home because he missed school due to an illness. The girl has already told the boy that she likes him, but he does not return that feeling. He tries to explain this to her and uses the current situation at hand to be an example; he tells her that they are alone in his room and that he doesn't feel anything regarding the situation. If he truly was attracted to her, he would certainly feel something, wouldn't he? Nervous? Excited? Anything? She leans in quite close to him and tells him that she is trying her best and wonders if that will ever be good enough. She asks him if it will ever be good enough. It's such a vulnerable moment that I feel this wrenching, heart-stopping pause as I wait with her for some sort of answer. Meanwhile, I've got tears streaming down my face as I empathize with her situation.
Maybe I'm a softie. Maybe I'm a sucker for pain. Who knows? It just reminds me so much of high school drama, first love, and painful goodbyes. Even though these situations are not necessarily the same as I have experienced, the same emotions are there. I am glad I am still able to empathize. I would be more worried if the tears didn't come because it would mean that I didn't understand anymore, that I could no longer feel those emotions.