The topic of this stimulating conversation:
I have spent the last two years trying to disprove this in my own life. All I had ever known before then was the happiness I felt from being validated by my relationships. I can honestly say that I am more comfortable with myself now more than ever and I'm the happiest I have ever been. I feel truly blessed in my life and I didn't need a man in it to achieve this.
My problem is with the word need. Sure, it would be nice to have a significant other to share my life with, but that's a want. I need water and food to survive. I don't need a relationship; I can live and be happy without one. However, being the romantic that I am, I also know that I will never feel complete without that deep, spiritual, emotional bond and love that you can only share with your soulmate.
I hate being wrong but I didn't have a response. Even after an entire night of thinking about it, I can't deny it.
So then I began to think to about the futileness of my attempts to be completely free of a need for love. But truth be told, I needed this time alone to discover myself. Being at peace with myself and knowing who I am makes me a better person for whomever I share my life with. The reality of the situation, though, is that if I become complacent with my situation as it stands, it is no different than settling on the mediocrity of my past career. Similarly, I am comfortable with where I am now but I know that there is something better out there that will make me happier and feel complete. If I don't pursue that, I am doing a great disservice to myself.
At the end of the day, I do need love. Damn you for being right. On the positive side, dinner and your company was lovely, even if the restaurant didn't get your order right.
Image courtesy of Le Love
The problem before, when you were trying to prove that you could feel complete without a relationship, was that you were ignoring the 4th dimension, time. You're not the same person throughout life. Life is a series of stages of personal development, and if you spent most of your young adult life in relationships, you just need to take time and breathe in and embrace a period of independence. And then you move on to the next stage.
ReplyDeleteI don't know why this keeps you up at night, Miss Drama Queen. ;-)
Nobody likes to be told that they *need* anything, especially something so irrational as love. Plus, I don't like to be proven wrong. It irritates me. =P Ha ha. Mostly, though, it had to do with the fact that I thought I had it all figured out, what I want vs. need in my life, how I can make myself happy, but it turns out that I still have figuring out to do. I suppose that will never change, but I like to convince myself I'm right all the time. =)
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