my take on it

I had originally written this blog post for Laugh Factory, but the owner didn't want me blogging because I "don't know anything about comedy." Well, those weren't his exact words, but it was implied. So here it is (and I think it's actually quite amusing).

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About one year ago (at a similar coffee shop as the one I currently find myself), I took a long look at myself and thought:

Is this really my life?
As my fellow blogger, Bill Dawes, has previously stated, following the antics of my everyday life will likely make you slightly more satisfied with your own.

Last June, I packed my bags, quit my job as a Technical Business Analyst at a prestigious Asset Management firm in San Francisco, and moved to the glossy, glittery, glitzy city of Los Angeles. Never mind that I was born and raised in Los Angeles for the first 17 years of my life... this was a new beginning!

I quickly became drawn to all the celebrities that are so easily accessible in Los Angeles.
I took an unpaid internship at an entertainment PR firm where I had essential and meaningful responsibilities such as getting coffee, transcribing voice recorded notes, and filling gift bags to be distributed at charity events. This was hardly the type of work I felt a college educated woman, such as myself, should lower herself to doing. Again, my thoughts led to:

Is this REALLY my life?
Discouraged and nearly broke, I retreated with my tail between my legs. I took a job doing the tech work I was trained in, the very cause of my misery and sense of futility that I had suffered for the last seven years of my life. BUT, at least I still had my pride and dignity.

So here's the thing, people. Listen up. This is very important.

WHEN YOU ARE MISERABLE, YOU ARE UNHAPPY.
I learned this pearl of wisdom from a very wise sage, also known as my astrological forecast. I often wonder what might have been had I not been born a Libra. Soon after, I was "discovered", Hollywood style, at a charity event held at Laugh Factory. Subsequently, I joined the trendiest gym in town, got the "Rihanna/Posh" haircut, bought a pair of Christian Louboutin heels, had a hot one night stand with "What's-His-Name" from "That One Commercial", and injected botox into my unfashionably unplump lips... I'm kidding! I use Lip Venom to pump up my pout.

Now as I look around this cafe, I no longer see doom and gloom. Instead, I see a beautiful, anorexic Russian model ordering water with Splenda, six people working on their screenplays, a couple of self-important suits talking on their bluetooths, and a man with the words "Los Angeles" tattooed on his left bicep. I take a deep breath of the smog-filled air and I think to myself:

Now, THIS is my life.